Memories for a eulogy

Before anyone writes a eulogy, it helps to gather what you remember. These prompts are a place to start. Answer the ones that bring something back and leave the rest; a word or two is enough. You can type here, or print the sheet, write by hand and give copies to family and friends.

Answer the prompts that bring something back and leave the rest. A word or two is enough.

Memories of

Written by

Everyday habits

The small, ordinary things only the people close to them knew.

  • How did a usual morning with them begin?
  • What did they always have with them, in a pocket, a bag or the car?
  • What did they like to make, grow, mend, cook or collect?
  • Where was their chair, their corner, their place at the table?
  • Which sound, smell or song brings them straight back?

Things they used to say

Their own words, as closely as you remember them.

  • What did they always say, at the door, on the phone, at the end of a meal?
  • Was there a nickname, a word or a phrase only they used?
  • What advice did they give, again and again?
  • What would they say, seeing everyone gathered for them?

What they taught

Sometimes in words, more often by example.

  • What did they show you how to do?
  • What did they care about getting right?
  • What do you still do because of them?
  • How did they treat other people, and what did you learn from it?

Small stories

Not the big events: one afternoon, one conversation, one moment.

  • A time they made you laugh. Where were you, and what happened?
  • A time they surprised you.
  • A moment you saw who they really were.
  • Something they did for someone that hardly anyone noticed.

People to thank

Who helped them, and who helped you. A eulogy often ends by naming them.

  • Who cared for them near the end: nurses, carers, doctors, neighbours?
  • Which friends were always there?
  • Who helped to prepare the service?
  • Who is missing today and should be remembered?

When you come to write

  • You do not need every answer. Two or three small, true details say more than a whole life story.
  • Ask a brother or sister, a friend or a grandchild to fill in a copy of their own. Each person remembers something different.
  • Read what you gathered aloud. The memories that make you pause are often the ones to keep.

getwellspeech.com

What you type stays in this browser on this device, so it is still here if you come back. It is never sent to us. Print the sheet to keep a copy, or clear it when you are done.

When you are ready, you can also begin a eulogy from these memories.

Questions

What should I write down for a eulogy?

Small, specific things: a habit, a phrase they always used, one afternoon you remember well. These are the details people recognise and hold on to. Dates and achievements matter less than how they were on an ordinary day.

Can several people fill in the sheet?

Yes. Print a copy for each person, or share the page, and gather the sheets afterwards. Different people remember different sides of the same person, and the eulogy is richer for it.

How do I turn these memories into a eulogy?

Choose one or two stories and a few details, then follow a simple shape: who you are, their life in brief, an ordinary day with them, what remains, and a quiet goodbye. The speech outline builder sets out that shape with a time for each part.

Is what I type saved?

Only in this browser on this device, so your notes are still here when you come back. They are never sent to us. Printing the sheet keeps a paper copy, and you can clear your notes at any time.

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